The Red Flags Cast Members of Love is Blind (Repeatedly) Ignored: Clay and AD

With over 5.1 million views, there is no question that Netflix’s Love is Blind has become a staple in pop culture as we know it. Season six has overtaken podcast conversations, sparked hilarity with memes, and essentially became a universal language that is spoken around water coolers around the world.

The experimental dating show has transformed the landscape of romance and reality TV, but this begs the question: are the contestants really there for healthy love – and, if so, are they actually ready?

According to self-help dating author Brianna McCabe, “The foundation of a healthy, stable relationship is built upon solid principles of trust, communication, respect, and support, yet many of these contestants are ignoring the red flags that signal that the relationship is heading in a completely opposite direction.” 

As the author of The Red Flags I’ve (Repeatedly) Ignored, McCabe breaks down the warning signs that Clay and AD should have acknowledged – both within their respective partner and themselves – as opposed to dismissed:

Photo: Netflix

Clay:

  • Clay participated in a show where the title is Love is Blind, yet made a comment to AD in the pods that he couldn’t marry someone without knowing what they look like first. (Make it make sense?) If looks are that important to you (and listen, we all place value in different things), then he shouldn’t have embarked on this journey that seemingly misaligned with his goals.

  • Clay kept reinforcing the ideals that because his father was a cheater, he fears that he, too, would eventually cheat on AD (as if it’s a hereditary gene that you’re doomed with from birth). That said, though, with therapy I am confident that Clay can eventually learn what it means to be in a healthy relationship.

  • Clay abruptly and sternly told AD that he wouldn’t let her gain too much weight – even while pregnant – and instead would encourage her to “get to the motherf*cking gym.” Whether it be his delivery or his mindset (or hell even both), that’s a red flag that AD shouldn’t have ignored as it reinforces Clay’s superficiality. 

  • When seeing AD walk down the aisle for the first time, some of Clay’s first words out of his mouth were, “Body!” instead of something more delicate and romantic. This signals that Clay is focusing on all the wrong facets of “love.”

  • After saying, “No” at the altar, Clay alarmingly shared with AD that he still desires a relationship with her despite rejecting her in front of family and friends at the wedding.

Photo: Netflix

AD:

  • At the very start of the experiment, AD commented, "If I see a red flag, I'm like, ‘Oh, well, I'll just paint my nails red to match.’” Huh????

  • During one of her moments on screen, AD made a comment that she believed that Clay was a “lady’s man,” yet she allowed her curiosity and her belief that she could change him to get the best of her. 

  • When Clay ultimately said, “No” at the altar, AD internalized his rejection as being a reflection of her, and not Clay himself. 

“When you recognize the red flags but start making excuses for them, that’s the biggest red flag of all,” shares McCabe. “It means that you aren’t putting yourself first and will start bending and breaking your own boundaries just for the sake of being romantically involved and getting pseudo-validation.”

According to McCabe, individuals must identify the root cause of why they themselves are ignoring red flags and use this as an opportunity to heal and repair one’s own self-worth. “Not until you are in a healthy relationship with yourself can you then enter a relationship with another,” she adds.

Stay tuned for Part 2 featuring Chelsea and Jimmy ahead of this week’s reunion episode.

TO LEARN MORE ABOUT DATING, SELF-LOVE, AND RELATIONSHIP RED FLAGS, GRAB A COPY OF BRIANNA MCCABE’S SELF-HELP BOOK, THE RED FLAGS I'VE (REPEATEDLY) IGNORED.
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